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I had one about mid evil torture devices. I was in a dungeon but I wasn't really there per say. Just a dream where you viewed everything as if it where a virtual reality.
Darkened cobbled stoned, brown and rusty room with people. Screaming, aching, dying. Not a thing to be done. One wall was lined up with iron maidens. Eyes peering out with a blood puddle on the floor. Chains, attached to those masks designed for people to wear in shame. Completely morbid.
What I viewed the most was something called a Choke pear. It was in a man's mouth for a while. The person twisting it didn't have such a clear face. It was blank. He only did half of the job, let the man stay hurt and finished him off later.
I woke up with a slight pain my my neck. o.O
What the fuck is wrong with me? I have the answer. I have been watching shows like[this] too often. >.o
I felt fine this morning. The others have a flu. I thought- oh, I had that last week, I won't be sick at all. Had an annoying head ache. Then I wanted my soda, I didn't feel like water. No! I wasn't allowed because there was hardly any left. They sent someone else out though and we got more. I drank up. Felt better and then it hit me, blah. Poor bathroom. xP (Didn't even make it there at first and had to clean that up but it wasn't much. x.x)
Last night I caught this on TV. Not the movie, the musical, which is something I always wanted to see (I've wanted to see it before the movie even came out, just never saw it on.). I enjoyed that.
One of the best songs in there of course, I wanted to post. ;P
Oddly enough, I ate dinner for breakfast. I think the song made me hungry. :x
I still have the VHS tape my mom made of this when HBO played it... Years ago. Wait VHS gave that away :p this musical is the reason I liked the Tim Buron movie, but did not LOVE the movie. The adaptations of the music were good, yet very lacking from this.
I think it's like how books can be compared to movies. You have the younger generation who grew up on Tim Burton and then the older generation who saw this. (My mother told me she had seen this live with her mother before I was even alive.) Both are good in my book, it's just that the musical has more of a feel to it. Movie was good like you said, but yet.. lacking. I wish I went to see things like this but it doesn't last forever on stage. lol
Haven't eaten much today. I still have yesterdays dinner for me in the fridge, untouched. I just don't feel like it. I'd rather drown my stress in a puddle of sleep. -Shrugs- Maybe tomorrow I'll want it. There's always tomorrow.
... If you could SEE me now (why do I want to sing show tunes all of a sudden?) you'd see me tapping my foot and pointing at the fridge saying, "Eat something, or you'll make yourself ill!"
That only works if she's watching the tv while you're on it though and then she'd have to watch it all the time... Is she insinuating that she'd rather watch you than her regular shows? That's not creepy at all.....
I'm such a snob some days. Really, I could have all the friends in the world if I wanted. I just hide all too often. >.>
So, I did what I had to do yesterday, today. Payed a bill and got some food. The banana milkshake that I wanted, I couldn't get because the store was closed. D:
As I was walking home some old dude who was trying to sell cell phones in front of a cell phone store said, "Hey, Beavis and Butt Head! I love Beavis and Butt Head." I totally ignored him and walked off. My inside train of thought was, "Bitch, stop looking at my ass." lol ( I had on Beavis and Butt head sleep pants.)
Then when I was a block away from my apt some old lady was passing by with her dog. She said, "Don't be afraid, she doesn't bite. She's a nice dog." I just ignored her like I did with the other guy. I don't want to talk to these creepy strangers. :P In my head I thought, "Put that dog near me and I'mma hiss. o.o"
People always feel the need to talk to me. It's funny. xP
Ugh I hate that shit! I swear I'm baffled by the people who see me on a train platform with headphones in AND reading and decide "there's someone I should ask if I'm on the correct side of the tracks...". I mean really! It's like having glamor that you can't frackin turn off!
I don't know if I'll be able to go later. I woke up feeling so sick. I mean, I feel a little better but still. I should at least head out to do some errands I guess.
Oddest thing about feeling like this is that feeling good makes me feel awful. o_O Like I want to vomit kind of feeling. Odd huh? Maybe that's just what crushing does to someone. lol I wish I had rotten thoughts so I didn't feel like this, unfortunately last night I was too mushy for my own good. Which made me really happy. :p
Ugh, little brat, I love you though. That's why I deleted your face book.
Why the fuck I saw you added a few of my friends though, I won't understand. You're young and stupid. Wait a while before joining again and I won't mind adding you one day.
Heh, 13 years old. You're old enough to join this place. I hope to hell you don't. :P
I wish I could type out what is on my mind but I can't bring myself to.
It interests me at this point that the mind can have so much more power over someone's intentions. The worst part is never saying a word which brings me here. A contradiction.
To secretly have something you don't want to worry about, yet, there it is. Every single time.
What is it that I secretly want in the end? Hmm. That I can't even answer.
I want to express myself thinking it'll stop. Then I remember that it probably is because of stress. Which is something that can't be helped at the moment.
I used to be so strong but maybe that was my downfall.
Change in plans for Monday. xP Guess that's what happens when they cancel out. I'm going to go with my mom and maybe my sister. I don't know. I have to take my mother to the dentist before hand because they need to fix her tooth again. Than it's off to the parade! Yay!
It was Lullaby who mentioned chocolate covered bananas the other day and I decided that I missed those. So, that is what I'll make as soon as someone picks up some bananas from the store.
I had chocolate cranberries a while back... eh. Not too great, but not terrible.
20:21 Jan 20 2012 Times Read: 614
Gonna see dragons on Monday! :D
I never really go to these City parades much. Any time I did go to the Chinese New Year one I ended up going late. This time I'm going to make it there early enough and by myself.
The brat will be at school and all that so it's easier if I go alone.
I don't have a camera really so I don't expect to bring back pictures into this. I use my sister's DSi for things but it's not good enough quality for that.
I will enjoy things like roast pork buns, a rice plate, bubble tea (Don't know which flavor yet.), and whatever else I end up getting for everyone who didn't go with me at home. :P
This past week I've been getting some really sweet dreams. When I do get sleep that is.
One dream was so realistic that I woke up but not in a bad way. xP Not the usual falling feeling but still a jolt, hard to explain how it didn't feel bad for the first time. o.O
When I joined this place one of the things I wanted to work on was my music taste. Sure, I had a good feeding of classic rock all my life but I wanted to explore more and didn't know where to start.
Of course that doesn't mean I'd just ask anyone for anything. Not everyone has the same taste. Example; I won't listen to country, or ICP crap at all.
What I am glad for is having learned things from covens (Mostly IS) and journals.
Allow me to blow your mind by introducing you to the glorious world of progressive metal.
Go forth and listen to Opeth, Dream Theater and Porcupine Tree.
... You're welcome.
13:43 Jan 18 2012 Times Read: 644
I love my mom so much.
She used to not like the idea of tattoos and now, she talks about them more than I do.
Makes me want another so bad right now. :P The one I've been wanting. >.> Don't know if I want it this month or the next. I'll see what happens. I've delayed it for months already.
My poppy was like that, and then when I started getting tattoos, he started researching them, and came to really like them (his previous experience had been with idiots who get things like "Fuck you!" tattooed on their arms and then still expect to find that acceptable and hireable in a corporate environment. Heh.)
05:33 Jan 18 2012 Times Read: 648
Peer pressure.
I don't want to.
I don't know anymore.
Of course I'd love to, I just... Well, you know why. >:( And I told you my last secret.
Took me 2 years to get all that out. Every secret I ever had, you know and I love you for it. You're a good parent. Besides nothing was ever my fault, over time of holding things to myself it becomes a burden, but now, it feels a little lighter.
You're getting quiet on me. Then again, I do the same some days. I don't like it but, I'm also in one of those moods so I guess it makes sense not to over think.
Oh, I shouldn't have put my feelings out like that, you. I was scary even to me. Heh.
And for anyone nosy. It's about me being clingy. lol
Mmm, mmm, mmm, it's good to be lazy some days. Time spent mostly on sleep and having yummy dreams about sleeping and cuddling and for some reason cursing too. o.O I know, boring of me, haha.
The doctor repulsed and offended me. I will never, ever go back there again. I can't even finish this entry, let's just say that if I want to get taken care of then I'd rather go to the ER. Or I should switch soon.
I can't even vent to this. She asked questions that weren't medical at all and it got me angry. Being the person that I am; I just sat there and took it. I've known that doctor for years and now she wanted to be mean? Geez... What a shitty day.
I managed to apply to another job though. That was a piece of hope.
I feel like I was beaten with a bag of bricks. My body is covered in aches and pains. I have the chills, just shivering while I have a fever. On top of that, a head ache. I don't enjoy this feeling.
I'm thinking I've had this for a few days since when I was last outside. Usually, I'm super strong, but when I was helping my mother with her chair I couldn't take the normal stuff.
I hate that. Not being so awesome. Like when we ended up having to take a few flights of stairs in the subway and she asked someone else for help. One man did and then the next guy was shit. He just went down without it and I was thinking, "Fuck it, can't get a guy to do my damn job." Heh, my ego is too stubborn because even though I did it in a snap it wasn't so good on me.
I'm going to the doctor's today, yes, but I have to bring my mother to the dentist in the afternoon first. At least it's not stairs that I'll be worried about. The bus isn't so bad unless I can't find a seat. I feel like I'll just pass out there and she can wake me up when we have to get off.
If anyone asks for my seat though, I'm not giving it up. If I even get a seat.
They have to take my blood and maybe give me shots. Ooo, needles make me giggle. Hell, everything makes me laugh. :x Funny Mr.Cuteness made a blood joke but he'd kill me if he knew I called him that. >.>
Hopefully I can try to get my hip checked out as well. Don't know how that'll happen. Might end up doing that another day for another appointment somewhere else.
I haven't slept well and I'd die for a massage. I'd freaking love one right now.
Anyway, on and on I had a fun time going over to a new coven with a small level account of mine. :) That was the highlight of my night.
Hope you get feeling better soon dear *hugs* Glad you like it in CCD :)
02:09 Jan 09 2012 Times Read: 721
I went to pet one of my cats while he was sleeping. He was still sleeping and then jolted and we both scared each other. By the way, I totally scream like a girl. XD
I hate the surprised fear girly yip I make. I completely sound like some teenage girly girl when I make that sound. I have yet to be able to school myself from making it. Heh.
I don't know which one of the boys is my favorite though. Were Wolfy has such a cool looking coat of fur and his black brother, Panther, I'd love to take outside one day in a blanket and go around saying I had a son. For the lols. xD I swear his fur looks like my hair. :P
01:06 Jan 09 2012 Times Read: 723
Something that's been on my mind; are all good artists crazy? Or is it just a saying?
We went to get a referral for the sibling in order for her to get approved for braces. All the way in another borough.
Heh, it wasn't all that annoying. We ate at a nice curry place and then went shopping for food at Trader Joe's. Trader Joe's has some interesting food. I wanted to taste Almond butter. It's like a Peanut butter, but different. I wanted Cashew Butter but they didn't have it. D: I haven't tasted it yet but I love being different when it comes to a "PB&J" sandwich.
The store line was so huge it went from one end of the place to the other. Times two. Since there were two lines. It was full of yuppies. I'm guessing that yuppies can be compared to what you kids say are hipsters? I don't know. I'm not used to all the new terms people come out with. :P
Some of the yuppies got pushy and bumped into my mother. Then they had the nerve to argue so, I started on about how people bumping into others were retards because I could do much more damage. :) Then a lady got nervous and slightly nicked my cart while passing by but had over heard me. She was like, "Sorry, sorry!". Lmfao! I love scaring people. xD
Just wondering if I could have a little space from lies. It's not good to lie, but hell, I've done it just to get out on dates, so why not anything by myself?
I don't feel like a woman of her word anymore. I feel like I've failed him. I have to stop looking on the wrong side of things but I can't help it. I'm stuck, as always, in my plans. To think all I needed were a few damned special pens.
Friday is when the case will stop. So, there's that.
Rest did me well. I have the feeling that I'll have errands to run. I haven't even spent time with the friend I wanted to see. Thanks a bunch for not understanding. Mood killer to be alone some days... You must have had so much fun at my age. I don't even want to get out at times. Simply because I wouldn't have the keys to get back in. It's cold out and I like living here, in warmness. Heh.
I don't know how I managed to pull it off but my hip hurts again. I took a nap today and all I could dream about was that hurting. >.o
Gah, I have to go to the dentist today and I have to bring someone else to another appointment. D: I really wish I could cancel out. It's not like they're being nice too. :/ Fuck it all. I think I was even a bit jealous with my last entry. What's one day of being a brat so I can rest up anyway? :p
It's so cold now too. I just want to snuggle up under the covers.
Lastly, I think I should get used to making more entries private. Just as a side note for myself. I hate my wording.
I'm going to protest you somehow. How is it that friends are always more important that me? You rush so fast to give them a metro and I'm never allowed to waste your money. Heh. You'll have to drag me out of my bed. I do enough around here. I don't even care that I'm jobless, you make that worse, you, can gtfo. :)
I went to put on my head phones just now and ended up with a ear full of safety pins. o_O Somehow one head phone became magnetized to the junk I had laying around my computer. o.O Why do I have safety pins here? Well, I don't know, just look at my mark. :P I love safety pins. :s
It's been good talking to a friend I knew since I was in middle school. Am I ready to hang out and enjoy myself again? I dunno. :P I like this year already. I'mma fucking rule this year, bitches! Rawr! It's nice and warm out too. Fuck yeah.
Meh, I don't think it really has an effect on me. And to think I stayed away from the keyboard for about an hour. Heh. Not worth it. Doesn't mean I'll not do anything later on. Just means I think it's pretty lame.
Thursday drink specials will be Blueberry Pie-tini & Sylvain's Rat Race cocktails Now playing, Hayden's choice Lubricant Like Kerosene (ft. Kim Dracula) by: SeeYouSpaceCowboy...
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